While we were on holiday, I noticed that I was spending at least a couple of hours each day checking Facebook for status updates. I have to do something when stuck in the house by myself, and I don't feel like reading novels or watching TV. I'm a compulsive reader, and Facebook was giving me lots of status updates from sites such as the Australian Greens, Australians for a Progressive Society, Wixxyleaks, Australians in Support of Asylum seekers, the Australian Conservation Foundation, and similar sites that share information about the things that matter to me: a society that is compassionate and inclusive and that recognises the urgent need for action on climate change. Unfortunately, given our current government, the news from these sites is overwhelmingly depressing, and I'm going to start blocking them, so that I don't get increasingly depressed about the future of our country, society, and environment, and the fact that a pack of lying hypocrites were voted into power by a gullible Australian electorate who believed the lies of the LNP prior to the election. I can't believe that everyone who voted for this government supports the actions of this government. I can't believe that my fellow citizens believe in punishing the unemployed, the poor, the disabled, the old, the sick, and people fleeing persecution overseas.
It just makes me incensed, and I don't need the stress it's causing me.
So I've deleted the Facebook App from my phone and iPad, and will henceforth only access it from my laptop. In the week since I deleted it from my phone, I've had more time to meditate, recuperate, and concentrate on being calm (apart from being upset by last night's federal budget).
BTW, having a bowel obstruction is a quick, but not recommended way to lose weight. I lost 2kg in the week that I spent in hospital, bringing me down to 83kg - nearly within the recommended weight range for my height, which will reduce the risk of further cancer. That's a loss of 11 kg since I was diagnosed with breast cancer in January last year. Since October, I've been following a diet low in sugar, refined carbs, and processed foods, lots of vegetables, moderate protein, and healthy fats. It's resulted in a gradual weight loss (helped when I got off the steroids that made me ravenously hungry), and I'm feeling healthier each day. But damn, I need to have a nap.
A blog started in 2013 to inform family and friends about my treatment and progress for early breast cancer. Then I went and got two brain tumours,,both GBMs, completely unrelated to the breast cancer, so the blog continues.
Background and overview
I learnt more about the health system from being an inpatient than I had in 20 years of working as a neuropsychologist. I was unexpectedly diagnosed with two brain tumours on 4/9/13. They turned out to be grade IV Gliomas (glioblastoma multiforme (GBM)). After removal of the right parietal and left occipital tumours, I received the standard treatment under the Stupp protocol (combined Temozolamide (TMZ) and conformal radiotherapy 5 days/week for 6 weeks), but the TMZ had to be ceased after 5 weeks because I had started to develop pancytopenia, where more than one of my blood counts had begun to drop. By Christmas 2013, I had become anaemic and needed a couple of blood transfusions. I ended up in hospital for 3 weeks of the 2014 new year after experiencing my first seizure (suggestive of a right temporal lobe focus) on 31/12/13). They were so worried about my bone marrow, they did a biopsy. Luckily, it was all clear of any nasty disorders. It had just been suppressed by the TMZ My blood counts slowly returned to normal with daily injections of GCSF, which stimulate bone marrow function, for several months. For 17 months I was doing better each day, without any physical impairments or major cognitive problems A third brain tumour was found in the right temporal lobe on 2/1/15, and removed 6/1/15, only to reappear on 17/2/15 after I started to feel vague symptoms at the end of 2014. I had my 4th round of brain surgery on 1/3/15, followed by stereotaxic radio surgery of a residual, inoperable, tumour, on 17/4/15. I've been feeling like my old self again since that highly precise form of radiotherapy, and it feels fabulous.
My way of coping.
I choose to live in hope that everything will work out for the best. I've learnt that even though things are sometimes unpleasant, life and love go on forever. I put my faith in the life force that created and unites us all in love, across all time, space, and dimensions. I refuse to succumb to fear, which is an invention of our imaginations. There are an infinite number of things to fear, both in this world an in our imaginations, and most of them never eventuate. I choose not to dwell on them, and to focus instead on counting my many blessings, current and past, and to have faith and hope that if I look after the present moment, the future will look after itself.
If you're reading, and haven't been in touch, please don't be shy, send me a brief private message using the contact form on the right. It's nice to know who's out there. Blogging can leave me feeling a little isolated at times (I used to have recurrent dreams of being out on a limb over a canyon, or of starting to strip off in a crowded waiting room). Your emails are appreciated, although I can't necessarily answer all of them.
